Catch up on Questions #1-5 (especially #5 because it does the groundwork for this question).
Very important question below!
Each in the Dating Journal Questions peels back a layer to the way we interact in a relationship. The following questions are very important if you are looking to create and have a healthy relationship. Please do at least #5, but ideally #1-5, to be able to make bigger realizations and shifts for your highest good and optimal healing.
How do you interpret love? Continue reading “Dating Journal Question #6”
Catch up on Questions #1-4
Sometimes we need to look back and understand the past to be able to move forward without repeating it. Isn’t that what every history teach told us through school? But it’s true. In order to create a new reality and a better future, we must understand the past.
The following prompt will give you clarity about how you learned to interpret love. Our caregivers, for better or for worse, are our examples of relationships and love. If they had a difficult time expressing or demonstrating love or affection, we’ll probably pull in a partner that does the same, because that is familiar. Even if this isn’t what we ultimately want, it’s how we learned love from an early age. Therefore these familiar behaviors or patterns in others confirm love for us because that is how we learned it. Even if we really want someone who is affectionate. So to be able to clear this out and pull in what we actually want rather than what we are just used to, we need to understand our early examples of love.
Question #5 Continue reading “Dating Journal Question #5”
Check out this post for background on this exercise and Question #3 to get caught up.
Step 1. List all the characteristic of your ideal partner (without mentioning looks). Do at least 20 things (even if they seem silly and small).
- Doesn’t play games
- Clear about his/her feelings
- Loves me unconditionally
Step 2. Go back over your list…how many of the characteristics listed do you possess? Are you kind? Are you clear about your feelings? Do you play games? Do you love yourself unconditionally?
If you are not clear about your feelings, how can you expect a partner that is clear? Why does the other person need to do all the work? Why do they have to be clear about their feelings but then you do not have to reciprocate? Why do they have to make themselves vulnerable if you are not going to be clear about your feelings? That seems a little unfair, selfish, and cowardly.
So if you really want a partner with the characteristics you’ve listed, the following question is, how do I go about adopting these characteristics myself? And eventually you can pull in a partner like your list.
Are you the partner that you would want to have?
I once had a client that only wanted to know which of his two suitors wanted him more, which one was more devoted, and which one wouldn’t leave him. When I asked him which one he wanted to be with, he would bring it back to, “Well which one loves me more?” So is this love or is this fear and ego?
In a relationship, we tend to just think of ourselves. When we imagine our ideal or current relationship, we think about how we feel and how our partner makes us feel. We want to be happy with our partner. We want to know our partner wants and loves us. Me me me me. But…how many times have you thought about how you want your partner to feel? Continue reading “Too much ME to make a WE”
Get up to speed and check out Question #1 and #2.
We learn love through example. Our example is usually our parents or whoever raised us. We tend to adopt our beliefs about love based on our parents’ relationship. If your parents’ had a hard time being kind to each other, you probably sometimes interpret jealousy or criticism as love (which they are not by the way). If a parent was very controlling, you may interpret control as love (which is also not love). These are important things to recognize because if you want a healthy relationship, you need to bring these things to the light to be processed and healed.
So the following questions are to take a look at your interpretation of love through what you’ve learned about it. Grab your Purge journal and give it a go.
- How did your parents/care givers show love to their spouse/partner/significant other?
- Did they use kind words? Gifts? Touch? Do nice things for them? Spend time with them?
- Give at least one example.
- How did you parents/care givers show love and affection to you?
- Did they use kind words? Gifts? Touch? Do nice things for you? Spend time with you?
- Give at least one example.
- How do you show love to your romantic partners?
- Do you see any similarities in how you give or receive love and affection?
- Give at least one example
Check out the Journal Question #1
These journaling prompts will help clarify what you want so you can manifest the right relationship for you and also help you to notice and set boundaries when you are in something you don’t want but are allowing.
Be honest with yourself during these questions. Your Purge Journal is a safe place for you to process.
Continue reading “Dating Journal Question #2”
Spring is in the air and so is love, so we’re focusing on relationships for this segment.
As mentioned in the What Do You Want? post, if you don’t know what you want, then it doesn’t matter what you get. So, it would make sense that to get what you want, you need to know what you want. I will be posting some journaling prompts to help clarify what you want so you can manifest the right relationship for you and also help you to notice and set boundaries when you are in something you don’t want but are allowing. Continue reading “Dating journal questions #1”