What is it good for? Absolutely nothing! (Anyone else into old Soul music? No? Well…carry on.)
What is fear good for? I bet you want to say “absolutely nothing,” and you would be wrong. Fear may not seemingly serve your highest good but fear can be used as a signal that something is off or unhealed. Similar to the way pain in the body signals that there may be injury or illness, fear can be a similar indicator for emotional health.
If we’re experiencing fear we’re usually living in the future. Eckhart Tolle explains that anxiety, worry, and stress, which are forms of fear, occur from living too much in the future. We don’t fear things in the past, do we? We may be sad, bitter, regretful, or unforgiving of the past but we don’t fear it.
Why do we fear the future? Because it’s uncertain, right? How many times have you thought, “…but what’s gonna happen?!” We don’t know! We don’t know. I stopped offering readings about the future because questions about the future are fear-based and I didn’t want to feed that mindset. The inquirer is looking for control of their fate. You never find yourself wondering, “hey what’s happening right now?” because you’re in the now. Right now, you’re sitting reading this. You never get anxious about something you’re doing right now. But you can be anxious about something you’re doing in 1 minute or what we assume and outcome will be in the future.
Anxiety, fear, worry comes from filling in the blanks. We assume we know what’s going to happen. We write in the story before it even happens. And the outcome, that we’ve made in our own minds is what makes us anxious. Or worried. Or stressed.
For example: I have a big test coming up. Right now, I am here studying but I start thinking, “What if I don’t pass? What if I can’t do it? What if I let everyone down? What if I’m not smart enough? What if _______?” And I go down the rabbit hole of all these elaborate and awful scenarios that will never happen but that make me sick with worry and anxiety. But what’s actually happening to me in real life, in that moment? What am I actually doing? I’m sitting here studying. Still haven’t taken the test. The anxiety is entirely self-created by me projecting out into the future. In that moment, I’ve just created my own personal hell by making assumptions and stories about the future. (And let’s be honest, how many times do the things we worry about actually happen? How many times have you actually had that confrontation you went over a million times in your mind? And how many times has the outcome to a situation been more manageable or better than you could have planned?)
So if fear-based emotions are self-created, why do we do it? Why do we indulge? Why would anyone want to do that to themselves? It may be a different answer for each person. It’s something to think about and we’ll go more into the “why,” in the another post.
In the meantime, if you find yourself living in the future and creating fear, try listing the things you are grateful for in the present moment. Even the things directly around you by saying, “I am grateful for….” Gratitude vibrates very high, like love, and is an easy method to pull yourself out of fear and back into love.
Beat the fear and choose love, my little light warriors, I’ll continue to provide to even more tools to do so.